You may have heard that “forewarned is forearmed,” and that’s especially true when it comes to a divorce. If you have some idea in advance that a divorce may be in the works, you can better prepare yourself for the future. It’s a lot harder when you’re blindsided to cope with both the emotional and practical concerns of a divorce.
Just because your spouse hasn’t openly discussed the idea of a divorce, it doesn’t mean that they’re still committed to the relationship. The signs that a divorce is coming may be all around you.
Common signals that a marriage is failing
Every situation is unique, but you can generally tell that your partner is no longer invested in your marriage when you notice the following:
- Increased emotional distance: If your spouse becomes emotionally distant, avoids discussions about the future or seems disinterested in spending quality time with you, that could be a signal that they’ve mentally “checked out” of the relationship already.
- A communication breakdown: Noticeable changes in communication patterns, such as frequent arguments, avoidance of important topics or a decrease in open communications about goals, troubles and plans, may suggest marital dissatisfaction.
- No interest in resolving conflicts: If your spouse consistently shows disinterest in working through even minor issues, it may indicate a total lack of investment in the relationship.
- Decreased affection and intimacy: This can happen due to stress, health issues, work schedules or age, but a sudden absence of physical and emotional affection can point to serious problems in a marriage.
- Increased focus on individual life: If your spouse starts prioritizing individual interests, hobbies and social activities over shared experiences and time spent together, it might indicate a telling shift in their priorities.
- Financial secrecy or changes: Unexplained financial secrecy, bank accounts or credit cards they “forgot” to mention or sudden changes in spending habits can be indicators that your spouse is preparing for a separate financial future.
Seeking emotional support outside the marriage: If your spouse starts confiding in someone else, spending more time with friends or family, or seeking emotional support from others, it could suggest a growing emotional distance within the marriage.
If you suspect that your spouse already has one foot out of the door, you probably have good reason to be concerned. It may be time to learn more about the rules for a divorce and how they apply to your situation so that you can adequately prepare.